Orphan

by The Raygun Girls

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1.
05:06
All I know are the pin pricks of pain that control me that hold me from reaching the end I push it aside in my mind eating energy it’s taking a toll I’m losing I’m losing control These feelings are crushing me The anger, the pain, the loss is too great These feelings are crushing me The anger, the pain, the loss is too great Your hands are soothing your voice is calming it takes the red haze away You light my darkest path and help me find the way but your ghost is fading and your body is gone My memories are slipping away I was about to give up hope when you came to me when you saved me These feelings are crushing me The anger, the pain, the loss is too great These feelings are crushing me The anger, the pain, the loss is too great
2.
My strength It comes from being happy to be alive for I could have died so many times the simple things are getting so complicated thinking too much and feeling not enough I am the wind that is stuck in the tornado Looking for freedom looking for your touch Your hands are calling Your heart is still haunting Looking for freedom looking for your touch Your hands are calling Your heart is still haunting me I'm about to fall and it seems that you don't care at all self absorbed and self contained you keep yourself far away The dreamer in me is searching for reality but all I get is a slap back from you I am so tired of trying to break through Looking for freedom looking for your touch Your hands are calling Your heart is still haunting Looking for freedom looking for your touch Your hands are calling Your heart is still haunting me Your words are like knives when you say goodbye Cutting through my pages cutting into my brain Looking for freedom looking for your touch Your hands are calling Your heart is still haunting Looking for freedom looking for your touch Your hands are calling Your heart is still haunting me
3.
05:08
I’ve been the devil I’ve been the queen I tried to give you everything you need I am a liar I am a saint I give you all of my inner hate I just try to keep it all alive Your destroyer is my desire What you see kills all of me Your desire Is my destroyer What you see Kills all of me I’ve been your demon I’ve been your prince kept the dreams at bay and promised lots of nothing I am a poet I am all fear These hands crush it all with eyes full of tears I just try to keep it all alive Your destroyer is my desire What you see kills all of me Your desire is my destroyer What you see kills all of me You watch and can’t be seen You’re closing in on me Destroying all I am Controlling all you can Your destroyer is my desire What you see kills all of me Your desire is my destroyer What you see kills all of me Your destroyer your desire My destroyer kills all of me Your desire is my destroyer What you see kills all of me
4.
04:53
Beautiful and she was In the moonlight Beautiful in the sun Swimming dancing round my head And she was Round my head Beautiful and she was In the moonlight Beautiful in the sun Swimming dancing round my head And she was Round my head Beautiful and she was In the moonlight Beautiful in the sun Swimming dancing round my head And she was Round my head Beautiful in the sun Swimming dancing round my head And she was Beautiful and she was in the moonlight swimming dancing round my head swimming dancing swimming dancing swimming dancing round my head Beautiful in the sunlight and she was In the moonlight Beautiful in the sun Swimming dancing round my head And she was Round my head Swimming dancing round my head she was Beautiful in the sun Swimming dancing swimming dancing round my head
5.
05:16
Anger depression despair takes up all the air around me crushing all who care My back is breaking under the weight my heart is aching too many tears too much too late My eyes are blinded My fears are burning My tears are driving the hate This hell is what I make it This hell is what I see This hell is made for all of us this hell inside of me People are dying people are suffering your phone is more important than your dreams fear of the other fear of the unknown you'd rather kill your brother than give a piece of your home you're piling on top of each other watching everyone bleed This hell is what you make it this hell is what you see this hell is made by all of us this hell is what you feed In this hell anger depression despair In this hell you avoid the signs to beware Push it under push it deep push it far below and keep it beneath it still won't disappear won't go away it just fuels the fire for another day This hell is what you make it This hell is what you see This hell is made for all of us this hell inside of me In this hell
6.
05:15
Preparing for the oncoming preparing for the end Let me hold you Let me mold you I’ll be the one who defends You’re Forced into hiding you’re forced to obey One day you will betray Pick it up and run Run far Pick it up and run Run far away Promises Promises it’ll turn out okay Cause we’re getting out alive Promises Promises We’ll be okay Cause we’re all getting out alive You’re Living a life looking over your shoulder every second you breathe Living a nightmare and every second I check are you alive are you Fighting for freedom are you fighting for honesty It’s time to go Time to let it go Pick it up and run Run far Pick it up and run Run far away Promises Promises it’ll turn out okay Cause we’re getting out alive Promises Promises We’ll be okay Cause we’re all getting out alive Save everyone And burn it all down Save everything But burn it all down A new history we burned it all down Destroy the faithless And burn you all down Promises Promises it’ll turn out okay Cause we’re getting out alive Promises Promises We’ll be okay Cause we’re all getting out alive This was all lies Just to keep you still It is all lies Just to keep you ill You are all lies And you will remain The same
7.
Proprietary programming Installed at birth Pay rent for your thoughts Lease your soul Raise your worth Privatize your prayers pay for time at the altar of despair free thought is a crime all we want is a solution all we want is some relief But there is only the purity Of realizing grief microchipped and scanned there is no end at hand electrocutionary troubling another signal begins a binary language of sin and we can't see within all we want is a solution all we want is some relief But there is only the purity Of realizing grief Fall down the spiral resistance is futile One mind, one thought a single piece of code that becomes a true awakening it's finally time to give in and kneel to submission and let us win all we want is a solution all we want is some relief But there is only the purity Of realizing grief all we want is a solution all we want is some relief But there is only the purity Of being machine (resistance is futile resistance resist us)
8.
04:51
9.
She looks in the mirror Can't see past the scars Tries to shut out the words That feel like burns from cigars Daisy's on the floor Her heads on the door Holding on to her heart She can't take anymore Daisy's in chains Daisy's in chains She's at war with herself And going down in flames She sings Ashes, Ashes The girl falls down Can't get back up Cause she's coming unwound Daisy's razor blades Daisy's cutting games Runs across hidden skin Now to hide the blood stains Daisy's in chains Daisy's in chains She's at war with herself And going down in flames Put them all away Time to put a smile on her face Opens up the door Makes sure nothing's out of place Daisy's in chains Daisy's in chains She's at war with herself And going down in flames Daisy's in chains Daisy's in chains Dreaming of the day She can silence the pain
10.
04:33
I got these chemicals running in my blood living and changing me building blocks of broken dreams they’re changing me these chemicals burning through my veins distorting my body I’m in pain I’m born disillusioned and grown in the ruin I’m damaged I’m damaged I’m damaged Damaged and drained My body is killing me twisting my form and my dreams my heart gets weaker every day with the anger and the pain I cannot change this life no matter how hard I try I’m living with the feeling that some day soon I will die I’m damaged I’m damaged I’m damaged Damaged and drained I wake up in the morning and I say to myself Just breath in My eyes open up and I say to myself just breath out I got these chemicals running in my blood living and changing me building blocks of broken dreams I’m damaged I’m damaged I’m damaged Damaged and drained
11.
Angels calling for my blood Destroying peace that holds someone Someone beside me someone inside me Everything’s gone in the colors I choose I won’t move the mountains for you I’m still alive Just look at me These scars have cut to the inside And my fears still bleed I’m still alive Jut look at me These scars have healed on the outside but these fears still bleed And it’s finally come down to this breaking down the ones we miss We fear all that we can see You fear all of me I feel the burning I feel the rage I feel the need to break this cage I’m still alive Just look at me These scars have cut to the inside And my fears still bleed I’m still alive Jut look at me These scars have healed on the outside but these fears still bleed Simple shadows passing by can you see the deaths that I survived The simplest truth the quietest scream the loudest heartbeat that you’ll ever see The strangest story most colorful dream these are all stuck inside of me But I’m still alive Just look at me These scars have cut to the inside And my fears still bleed I’m still alive Jut look at me These scars have healed on the outside but these fears still bleed
12.
05:16
Every morning they all say Suck it up cause We’re all dying anyway and you still have Dreams of white and Dreams of saviours but we’re all just dust No angels just strangers You take it away You rip it all away rip it away from me You take it all away from me this loss is too big Too big for your religion cause I’m wounded I’m pained I’m distraught This way I tear at the feelings Crying in this hole I’m alone Dying Alone You take it away You rip it all away rip it away from me You take it all away from me I can’t stand this burning I can’t stand the touch Don’t try to save me I’ve lost too much we’re all just dust I’ve lost too much You take it away You rip it all away Rip it away from me You take it all away from me You take You take it away You rip it all away Rip it Rip it away from me You take it all away
13.
05:15
In the silence of serenity We get lost in what we cannot see your feet are planted on this ground and your head is lost high in the clouds Turn around Keep walking backwards The sun is blinding And you can’t think About running keep running keep running from the answers Simple truth simple justice keep it here You keep running from the answers Just keeping it real I am the problem I am the key I am the one who won’t simply be I am the privilege in the chosen few Stuck on the bottom and pulled down Kept in the darkness I’m drowned in the crowd If I take this remedy Will you all see The captivated hypocrisy Of my independence my stubbornness And your need To run keep them running keep them running for the answers Simple truth simple justice Just keep it real I am the problem I am the key I am the one who won’t simply be I am the privilege in the chosen few Stuck on the bottom and pulled down Kept in the darkness I’m drowned in the crowd Pull me up and pull me out Keep pouring it on pull me up and pull me out Or just let me drown

about

2 years in the making. 13 tracks of crunching, melodic Goth Metal heaviness detailing a journey through the pain of death, surgery, the thought of living on the edge, and surviving through it all.

credits

released May 8, 2020

Geoff: vocals, guitar, bass, drum and synth programming
Ryako: vocals on "Lie With Me"

All songs written by Geoff Saavedra, except "Lie With Me" lyrics by Ryako, "The Harm Anthem" lyrics by Petra Faulk, "You Dumb Sick" lyrics by Tasha Gibbs.

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The Raygun Girls New York, New York

The Raygun Girls is a one man band creating Hard Rock for the Apocalypse, crossing genres with Metal, Goth, Industrial and Punk music. The sound has been compared to Rob Zombie, Killing Joke, Disturbed, and Prong.

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